Cry and SHOUT

I just wanna cry and shout ‘till my voice is finally broken. I don’t know what to feel, what to say or even what to do. I find myself completely lost. I don’t have any clue of which way I should follow for now on. I kinda think that I don’t belong not here not anywhere. Maybe this is stupid but…oh, jeez! It hurts so bad. My life is out of my hands and no one lets me handle it. Every time I make a decision someone tells me is not the right thing to do. Or blames me ‘till I step back. And now is the time when I can say that I can’t deal with this situation anymore. I’m sick and tired of being manipulated and treated like a child. Well, how many times did I say this same thing? Yeah, a lot. And, how many times did anyone listen to me? Ok, not even one. They preferred to smile or laugh at me like I’m in some kind of mental disorder. I’m kinda used to be ignored and not taken seriously, but to get used is not the same as to accept the fact that your becoming invisible.

And tomorrow someone is coming and I can’t deal with it. I just…I can’t. I’m not prepared to deal with it, not now. But I have to face it, and it makes everything more and more difficult. It hurts, it hurts, it HURTS A LOT.

Ok, I have to say: LIFE SUCKS!!! It’s a cliché but I like saying it. Although I know, for sure, that this will change soon. The very same moment I take full control of my life, LIFE will be better. I promise (mental note).

Well, I guess this is the end of today’s entry.

Dream with who you wanna be and be what you dreamed.

xxooxx

Nyah